JENX:

Meanwhile as this is all happening. I am STILL ON THE PLANE!

BARB:

Too bad, you missed Hunka Monka, (Barb addresses "Other friend").

Where was I? Oh, yes. In the fast lane with Mem. So we've missed Mem's exit, we've missed the second best exit, and now we are zooming down the eastward arc of 287. When the signs started to read Perth Amboy, Mem allowed as how we were way the h*ll away from where we needed to be. Good thing Jenx's plane was so delayed. Probably would be a good idea to head in the general direction of the airport, though, instead of away from it. I nodded my head in complete agreement.

"Whaddya think? Shall we take this exit?" Mem asks.
"This is your part of Jersey, not mine. I don't even know where we are except we are way the h*ll south of the airport. Of course, that's not a big problem, cuz eventually we will cross the Parkway and the Turnpike. Sooner or later you always cross the Parkway and Turnpike," I said as the Parkway exit appeared and disappeared on our right, 4 lanes over.
"Yeah," Mem agreed, wrenching the car over a couple of lanes and zooming off on the Route 22 exit, where we found we were bound for - yup - Bound Brook. At which point Mem said in an awed tone, "We're in Bound Brook." :shock:

After we get over the shock of being in Bound Brook, which is downstate to say the least, we start scoping out the restaurants because after all, this was a quest for food when we started. "That's a nice one," says Mem, pointing at a steak house. "Maybe we should see how much time we have. You know, whether it's fast food or a sitdown dinner before her plane gets in."

At this juncture, Mem grabs her cell phone, brings up her number index, hands it to me and says, "Call the airline. Let's get a status on the flight."
"Good thinking," says I. What's the flight number?"
Silence.
"Wait," I said. "You gave it to me the other night and I wrote it down. I have it here somewhere." At which point I dig through my purse like a dog digging up his favorite bone. Ten minutes later I gave up. "I probably left it on my desk. Sorry."
"Ah! Just call the airline and describe the flight. They'll tell ya."
"OK," I say, looking at the phone display for the first time. It is very, very tiny. "Uh, just a sec. I need my glasses."
"Oh, give me that!" :roll: she says, snatching it back from me, scrolling, reading and driving. I look to see if there is a passenger airbag. She hands it back to me and lo! I am being connected to the airline.
"For flight status and time by flight number, press 1. To confirm reservations by flight number, press 2..." and so on for about eight options that do not apply to me because I do not have a flight number.

Mem says, "Just say blibbablibbablibba" at the same instant that I do a "Hail Mary" prompt on "0". I glance at her to make sure she has her hands on the wheel. After a series of clicks and wheezes - from the phone, not Mem - I am thrown into another useless menu but with a saving grace. Somewhere in the midst of all of it, the voice intones, "Say AGENT now."

I take a deep breath and say "AGENT" with as much authority as I can muster in my present circumstances. Click click and I am speaking to a human being.

"Hello. I need information on a flight but I don't have the flight number. It was originating in St. Louis bound for Newark, originally scheduled to land at 5:45 but delayed 2 hours due to weather."

"Your flight is destined for Gate 30 with an arrival time of 7:10. Thank you for calling....."
"She said 7:10!" I look at my watch, I swear, for the first time since we got in the car. It is 6:40. :shock:
"What time is it?" Mem asks.
In my best Don Knotts impression I gibber "S-s-s-six f-f-f-forty." :shock:
"Sh*t!!!" Varooooommm. At that exact moment, every Sunday driver in New Jersey converged on that section of Route 22. In the midst of this, Mem points to a roadside restaurant and says "That looks like a nice place, too."

Imitating Ralph Kramden talking to Ed Norton, I raised my voice a teensy bit and said, "WILL YOU STOP POINTING AT RESTAURANTS AND DRIVE?!"

If Mem had been riding a horse, this would have been the part where she would hunker low on the horse's neck to lower the wind resistance and start slapping the reins against the horse's flanks. She actually did slap the door a couple of times.

"OK!" she yells. "I need you to help me watch! I'm gonna get on the Parkway-" (yes, we were crossing the Parkway again. Told ya.) "-and then I'm gonna get onto 78 real quick after the toll!" (Yes, the same 78 we had by-passed before. It's a Jersey thing.)

"I got your back!" I screamed. "Go for it!

We zigged and zagged and by 7 o'clock we were within a couple of miles of Newark Airport. Mem's cell rings. "JENX!" we shout in unison.

Mem answers. "HELLO!" Then her voice drops two octaves and takes on a sweet tone. "Oh, HI, Pon, dear. How are you?" They chat for a few minutes as we approach the Newark Airport ramps. Pon's cell connection drops out.

The phone rings again. "JENX!" we shout in unison. I answer this time because Mem needs all her concentration for the airport ramps. It's Ponbon. The call waiting signal sounds. "Sorry, Pon, gotta go!" I'm not in time to pick up the incoming call.

The phone chirps again. "JENX!" we shout in unison. And sure enough, this time it was Jenx. She was on the ground at the gate. Which meant she was still at least 10 minutes away from us and we were only five minutes away from baggage claim. We squeal into the parking lot, park, hop out of the car, cross eight lanes of traffic with the light and dash into baggage claim just as Jenx appears from the escalator.

Mem and I manage to look very casual and unconcerned as we exchanged hugs and kisses, but as soon as Jenx turned toward the luggage carousel, Mem and I turned to each other, rolled our eyes :roll: :roll: and gave each other a well-deserved High Five! :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

Is that how you remember it, Mem?

CAROL:

Uh Yep!

Know what else I remember? I remember that this was only the beginning of an AMAZING weekend!!!

Unfortunately, we stopped after this entry and have lamented it every time we go back and read it. CM